Ends and New Beginnings

Ok so I just watched a video on Youtube, where basically Ali left Spain after living there for 3 months, which must be hard to say goodbye to all the things, places and of course people. Personally, the closest I've came to that is when I left High school which was hard after all it was a place where I spent a lot of my time. But it wasn't the school, it was the memories and I did get the movie flashback that you get when your about to leave or finish something. Even thou I have been back to the school, obviously for exams and then for just general in the place, might go and see people who are there still for sixth form. I mean I have been back but still I'm not a student and it kind of begs the question, "did I make the right decision in leaving?" I did, but I had people there and I don't want to use them. That school I did find out who, I was and who my real friends were.

I wrote a blog on leaving school, on my old blog, but you know what. I thought I'd never go back? I have and the truth is I might be working there soon. So I guess that school even thou I've left as a student, It's still one place that I won't forget, even if I'm gone for ages from that. That gives me time to miss the people there.

Being a Good Friend or Being Used?

Ok so this does link into Just To Get High, but it's through own experience, not quite Drugs. Well not hard drugs. Anyway off the subject.

I feel like I'm guilty of being too caring about my mates and looking after them. People say "oh Your an awesome mate, cuz your there all the time." or "Your always therefore people and people trust you." But I don't know. I mean I admit I care about people, but it's sort of hit me now that a few people are taking advantage of that maybe not on purpose, but they still are. Sometimes I just seem, as I'm back up, not a mate. Like I thought it was just me being paranoid but I think since I got into college I've realised that maybe, what is one of my strengths maybe, some people are using that against, whether they know it or not.

Writer's Block

Ok so, lately Writer's Block has hit me and ideas block to be honest. Like the whole plan of the book, that I (stupidly) not finished before I started writing. It's been a problem of mine for a long long time, I always have the big idea and it's like "OMG MUST WRITE, FUCK THE PLAN!" but then a few months or weeks or whatever, the block hits and it's like "man, should have done a plan" I learnt my lesson for essays and so on, but in writing for not set reasons I never seem to plan. So maybe I'll go back and write a long and detailed plan, perhaps even character ID's and so on .

So here's the update on the story, I've hit Chapter 3 and it's all set after a suicide attempt but I won't tell you who tries. Recovery is what this chapter is about, after all the pain, but I guess recovery in all pain cases is slow. You brake a bone it takes a while to heal, You get your heart broken, It may take a lifetime to recover.